Body Language + Presence
Your body language reveals a lot about who you are. If you have great body language, everything becomes easier. If you have a strong physical presence, you command respect. Your very presence evokes and embodies confidence. Get this right and the world opens to you. Whether it’s asking for a raise, getting a date, closing a sale – doors will open for you.
It all begins with the eyes.
The importance of the eyes cannot be understated. The eyes are the window into the soul – and provide a glimpse into who you truly are as a person. When we look at other people, our natural instinct is to look at them in the eyes. Animals also look into the eyes. It’s the natural instinct of living beings to look into another’s eyes to sense their characteristics, their intentions, and their overall demeanor and personality.
When an individual darts his or her eyes around too much and cannot rest them on a single object or make eye contact with another person, it makes the person seem untrustworthy. First impressions mean a lot, we never get a second chance to make a good first impression!
That’s why it’s so important to be mindful of your body language and the impression that you give off by your posture and the simple movements of your eyes. Mindfulness – the ability to observe your own thoughts and actions in the absence of one’s ego, is a powerful agent for personal transformation.
Transforming your physical presence to be more potent, under normal circumstances, can take a lot of work and many hours of silent meditation.
But there is a meditation shortcut I’ve learnt which rapidly accelerates the process – which you’ll read about below.
Meditation is great for directing your focus and centering it. What happens is our minds tend to race off to all kinds of random thoughts. When you meditate, you bring your thoughts back to the center by focusing only a single object, thought, or visual image.
“The easier you can make it inside your head, the easier it will make things outside your head.”
– Richard Bandler
Focus on a physical activity (yoga, martial arts, writing, or playing music) is another form of meditation and another great way to improve focus. Our minds tend to turn inward, often in a disruptive way, when they lack an external focus.
Focus is not something that comes easily. I’ve heard that 47% of the time our minds wander. Nearly half of our waking lives! To cultivate focus requires intense discipline and practice.
A Powerful Focus Technique
I practice an exercise that not only increases the outward appearance of focus but also one’s attention span.
My favorite hack for developing a deep, silent focus is to practice counting letters on a page. You can pick up any book and begin. You can do this exercise with anything: a newspaper, billboard, or an advertisement. You don’t have to worry about comprehending what you read. All you have to do is start at the beginning and count each letter, one by one.
Jack and Jill went up the hill: To fetch a pail of water.
1-2-3-4-5… 45 letters.
Keep going until you finish the entire page, and if you feel so inclined, continue on until the next. It’s harder than it sounds! In the beginning, you may be able to only get through a few lines before you lose focus or your mind wanders. But as you practice this exercise more and more, you will find your focus and attention increase and you will be able to perform the exercise longer.
Over time, you will find that you have cultivated a deep and lingering focus. This deep focus manifests itself in your physical presence and influences how you interact with your environment and with people.
Practice this exercise from time to time, and in one year you will be amazed at how far you’ve come! You will notice people start to acknowledge you more and lend you greater credibility. You will feel more attractive, more confident, and emboldened to pursue ever bigger goals in life.